Hello.
I think Andrea is in the midst of something similar to a bad trip this morning. She can barely talk, is not lucid and seems almost frightened at times. We called off one visit scheduled for today and may have to cancel other visits unless she improves. I'm hoping that will happen as the drugs in her system wear off.
I moved Andrea to a wheelchair this morning and hoped that she could sit outside for a while, but that did not happen. She just wanted to go back to bed.
Sorry to have to share such bleak news. Here's hoping for some better news later today. Whatever happens, I will share with you.
s
============Evening Update==============
I gave Andrea 1/4 of an Ativan tablet around 11:30am, thinking she'd be better after a couple hours sleep. I didn't give her the usual second dose of ritalin around noon or 1, or even methadone. She has slept most of the time since then, waking, or semi-waking for a brief period, then falling back asleep. We talked a little bit when she was mostly awake. She said she felt like a big blob and only her lungs moved. She also said she didn't feel like she had to go on living. I told her she didn't have to live for anyone else and that her feelings were totally understandable under the circumstances, but let's reassess tomorrow. I promised her we'd cut back on all the drugs so that she could have a better sense of what was happening with her body. A final note, I took Andrea off oxygen for a few minutes while I was moving her, but she did not do well. So. We shall see what tomorrow brings.
Good Night
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Last night I could harldy breathe, thinking about Andrea in bed, as the clock inched closer to midnight. I let out a sigh of relief that she made it through another day...only to resume her brave battle today.
ReplyDeleteI hate the thought of her being scared. Can the hospice recommend a spiritual advisor to talk to her? I hate to risk a swarm of locusts by going to church and I don't think a priest would help much, but I'd do it if it helped!
53 hugs from me and the Followers!
Stan, I'm so sad to read about today. On the other hand, I'm so glad to hear the words that you shared with Andrea. It's so important. Her future is truly in her hands, her desires, her timing. My heart is with you both. I love you so much. I think the most important thing now is her peace and comfort, being without pain or fear.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you guys every minutes,
Love, Judy
Judy you spoke my heart. Steph - I always say the wrong things. She wants you there, that's why she is more agitated, she is holding on to you,
ReplyDeleteStan, without you we would all be scared, alone, not knowing.
I hope tonight brings rest and nothing more.
love you so,
Wendy
Stan,
ReplyDeleteI can't add anything else that Lynne, Steph and Wendy didn't express. I'm with you and Andrea every minute these days. Know that, my friend.
Praying for another good day for Andrea.
Love
Gary
I had a long night's dream about Andrea last night. She was in bed, but fat and round and rosey. She said what kept her from buying me things was a joke she heard, a guy (funny voice) saying, "get back in the car: BACK in the car." Of course, in the dream this cracked us up. We laughed til we cried. Then she wanted to do my hair. She divided it in sections, spray painting the lines in silver, cause the light was fading. Soon, as she tired, we laid down side by side and she continued to section my hair. It felt so good. so gentle. It got darker, and I realized we were both closing our eyes. I could feel she was drifting. I asked, do you want to rest? she said yes. I woke up and made a slow beeline to the blog. No update. My heart is heavy, but full. And wondering
ReplyDelete